"You have got to start somewhere," she said, and I am right between "on to something" and "nowhere at all" so it seems like I am finally in the right place for once.

I don't have the words yet. I have tried, and tried hard, to find the ways to say all the things that I am wearing in my heart, but I haven't yet found the way to put them all together so that they present the right picture. Sometimes when I explain it, it just seems small, even insignificant. Other times it doesn't seem believable, and still other times, I don't even get it all out, because there is so much to say, I just run off in another direction.

I want to share my stuff now, finally. I want to tell my story, and maybe even learn from it. I want to examine, and explain, and extricate all the junk that has cluttered up this mess we call Katie, even if just to know I have done it...examined, explained, extricated, lived.

..